Saturday, November 16, 2013

Love is in the air

Courtney and I were having a little mommy-daughter talk (I **LOVE** those!!).  We were talking about how we love one another, which led to a discussion about love languages.  I remembered many years back doing the love language thing, but honestly I only remember my love languages.  Shoot, most people who know me as more than just an acquaintance know my love languages.  I am a doer and a gift giver.  And it is painfully obvious!  Courtney wanted to know what her love languages were, so I let her take the quiz online.  Then Carlee, not wanting to be left out, had to take the quiz as well (Btw, she read the questions herself! She even took the computer from me so she could answer them herself --- little Miss Independent!).  My creative juices started flowing.  If we are able to see how we love and how those we love receive love, we might be able to show one another love more often.  Our house can be....well...let's just say we sometimes speak to each other like we are all in an old folk's home that ran out of hearing aid batteries (normal-ish, right??!?!).  We are trying to speak to each other more kindly and show each other love more often.  So me and my computer got to work.
Since birth, I've known that Courtney is a physical replica of Damon and a emotional replica of me.  Carlee is the exact opposite.  Looking at this super crafty chart really opened my eyes.  I love by doing and giving.  I can fold Damon's shirts until the cows come home (Sometimes it feels like it...but in 11 years I have learned to fold like a good military wife!! ).  But if I don't make some effort to hug him, snuggle with him, and hold his hand, it means nothing.  Carlee is the same way.  I can't tell you how many times I have made her bed and picked up her clothes and she doesn't even give it half a thought.  But if I don't tell her how wonderful and special she is to me, she is crushed.  She LOVES physical touch....she hugs complete strangers.  She will shove herself into the smallest spaces, just to be held by those she loves.  On the opposite side of the coin is Princess Courtney.  She hates being touched unless she initiates it.  Like she will pull away from you and give you the stink eye if you try to hug her.  She loves hugs that she initiates from those she knows well, but the rest of you have been warned.  She has a mean stink eye!!! I pity the poor boy who tries to make his move and hold her hand. 
Selfless love, the kind of love we should have for our spouses, our children, and our Lord, is a love that puts our needs aside.  It is a love that says, "I will spend more time physically touching you, telling you how much you mean to me" even though that's not the way I roll.  Love is about "me".  Unfortunately our wayward world has fallen for that twist from Satan thinking it is indeed all about "me".  Our kids have fallen hard for that lie.  Imagine how different our world, our homes, our minds would be if we loved the way God intended us to love.  Imagine if we put aside our needs and thought about those we love more each day.  You see when I selflessly fill Damon's love bank, he in return fills mine.  We are closer, happier, and stronger because of it.  Isn't that the beauty of it all?  When you focus more on those you love, and less on you, you end up a better person in the end.

Till next time,


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